Posts Tagged ‘nightgame’

When and how to Open Direct (Day or Night Game)!

Sunday, December 7th, 2014

directI talked about approaching in my post about the Greenpeace Opener, including:

Don’t open with “excuse me” or “I know this is random but… .”

I often start with “Hey…” but you don’t always need to tack something in front of the opener. People use “I know this is random” with direct openers, but it minimizes the directness of the approach. So, either go direct or don’t, but don’t minimize a  direct approach. A direct approach SHOULD be direct by design. As far as “excuse me,” it puts you in the frame of having interrupted her like Greenpeace or other people asking for money…which often makes people become defensive. I know a people who open with “oh my god” and then the opener, and it’s fine.

What is a direct opener? A direct opener shows (sexual) interest in her from the beginning.


1) I saw you and I had to meet you.

2) You are f-ing Adorable!

3) You are the cutest/coolest woman here!

4) I’d kick myself if I didn’t come over and meet you.


1) You are clear in your intentions.

2) Extremely confident opener.

3) Saves time since you don’t waste time on girls that would have been no’s anyway.

4) You get occasional VERY strong positive responses.


1) Your blow out (hell no) rate is much higher than with an indirect playful opener.

2) You blow out with some women you could have done well with if  an indirect playful opener was used.

What do I mean by playful indirect? Open with humor, teasing or banter.

So, when should you use direct openers? If you are getting IOIs (Indications Of Interest, which in this case are body language interest/flirting signals), she is already attracted to you, so open direct. Otherwise, open indirect playful. This gives you a better chance with girls who already like you (with direct) and a better chance with girls who might need some attraction triggers (like humor) to decide. Some good body language books for IOIs are Superflirt and Superdate by Tracey Cox.

In contrast, here are some indirect playful opener examples:

Crayola Kid (see the above link)

Some of the Pickup 101 Banter Deck cards are ok as openers. “Hey my eyes are up here” (if she looks at your pendant or shirt) is my favorite PU101 banter line.

I make ridiculous/funny accusations. Girls with laptops just outbid me on Ebay on fuzzy bunny slippers. Girls with cell phones are playing Angry Birds and “This is an Angry Birds free zone…there was an incident 2 months ago and it was ugly, but you can play Candy Crush.”

I ask for restaurants or menu items (or Starbucks drinks) that “don’t suck.” Or I ask for their 2nd favorite (whatever) and bust them on it…saying that was their favorite, but I want her 2nd favorite. She then qualified herself to me.

In a bar, I tell women who are trying to pass me that “I charge $1 each way, but maybe I’ll give you a round trip discount.” But, if she is drink or has to go to the bathroom badly…she may blow you out.


This weekend’s bootcamp (May 29-31) – post one

Monday, June 1st, 2009

This weekend was a blast.  I worked the Venusian Arts bootcamp with Lovedrop, Discovery (London), and Adept (a local coach like Knack).   VA calls me (and adept and Knack) in when they are in NYC or DC.  The students mainly seemed to be from NY, PA, and the DC area…although one flew in from NM.  Knack is in Mexico (not NM) right now.

Girl Candy was there as were two former students of mine from last year – one of which (Derby, who Discovery called “Darby” at the beginning of the bootcamp and “Ditzy” near the end) is now a sales associate for VA (they are looking for more sales help, btw).   The other student is a great guy who is a former stutterer who helps other stutters speak better – a leader in that community.

I don’t want to give a play by play on the whole thing, but I will write a few posts about the weekend.

On meal breaks, anyone who wanted to could come with me to whatever restaurant i was heading to…so I got to spend time with the students outside the lectures and clubs, including ones who didn’t join us in-field.  Some of my stories are about the daygame that happened between the hotel and meals.

In a bar (Saturday night)…I asked a girl for her # and she she “No. you give me yours.  I’m a contract negotiator. You won’t win this, give up now!”  I got her # anyway and she and her room mates met us elsewhere later that evening.”   Many times, you can get a number even if a girl says no.  In this case, she was “shit testing” me – seeing if I’m real and can handle her.

To Be Continued Soon…