Posts Tagged ‘Daygame’

So, where are you from?

Wednesday, July 7th, 2010

It is funny, because this may seem like an AFC question (like “What do you do?”) when asked early on but I’m in a very transient city, where people are from everywhere and it gives me (with my food-based identity) an easy jumping point to talking about food.

Yesterday, I picked up a HB8.5 on the bus and (bounced to) metro. She just moved here from S. Cali. Easy jumping point to me telling stories about chili peppers, and to busting her…on CA people thinking Mex food sucks here. Easy transition to seeding and letter settign up a taco date. I generally don’t setup food as a first date, but this is really inexpensive and turns out the same price as meeting for drinks at a HH. And, it’s nearby.

Free Daygame Talk

Wednesday, July 7th, 2010

I’m having a free daygame talk in DC on a weekday evening in a couple of weeks. Email me for info and to RSVP at cuisine@daygamer.net.

-Cuisine

Social Proof Revisited

Saturday, April 24th, 2010

I have talked about social proof before – here, and here (hired guns).  Let’s talk about social proof some more.  In talking to hired guns, my wings, and random people, I have noticed that social proof (and showing a good sense of humor) often causes HBs to open me.  I was joking (in my limited Spanish) with the girl making my sandwich at a large Italian deli, and the HB8.5 (tall blond) waiting on line next to me laughed at my what I was saying.  This HB understood some Spanish. I took her laughing with us as an approach invitation (AI) and she responded with IOIs when I actually opened her.  I’ve also had women open me in this situation; I say something funny to someone else and they use it as an excuse to open me or AI me.  Vibe with everyone around you…it’s fun and it is social proof.

7 Daygame tips from Love Systems

Monday, April 12th, 2010

Ok, I’ll admit that these are better than I’d have thought.  I’m commenting above and their tips are below.

That said, #1…eh.  True that you probably aren’t going for same day pulls.  Time frame wise, their is no set time frame. Sometimes day game # closes are 2 minutes. Sometimes you bounce them and are on a 2 hour instadate.  I’ve had several 7 hour daygame instadates.  It’s definitely easier to just # close and not instadate/bounce her or go for kiss closes, but feel it out…because all kinds of things are possible if you are flexible and you pay attention to their responses.  Also, sometimes you can get the # and then get them out again that night (Adept does that).

2. Not sure they are teaching this right. Yes, you can kino in daygame, and social touches sounds great, but I’m not sure that most guys know what that means. I like to show clients HOW you escalate kino in daygame, because you can escalate.  It’s also environment based….tone it down a LOT on metros (trains) and platforms.

3. They push direct too much.  I generally open with funny indirect and banter, so I open on an attraction trigger.  Direct is fine, but not as an “every approach” kind of thing, unless your outer game is really good.  a combination of types of openers is good too.

4.  Agreed, but you can come up with kino routines for daygame.  Try the Ring Routine (It’s on the internet, I’m sure.) And, practice social kino and some kino escalating.

5 . Hmmmmm.

6.  Smiling is important in day and night game.

7. True.

-Cuisine

————–

Love systems 7 tips:

Seven Day Game Tips You Can Use Right Now

    1. Usually people have stuff to do during the day – unlike at a bar, where she can spend hours with you. Good Day Game approaches usually lead to phone numbers + dates as opposed to going straight to the bedroom.

    2. Forget almost everything you know about touching (“kino”) and the Phyysical Progression Model. Being “touchy” and escalating is GREAT at a bar or club. During the day, in public, in bright light, it can seem creepy. Stop at “social touch” and save the rest for your date.

    3. Try “going direct.” She knows you’re hitting on her anyway – people don’t approach random strangers during the day unless they want something – so why not get the credit for having confidence?

    4. High-energy routines are often out of place during the day. They’re also unnecessary. At a cafe, you’re not competing with a million flashing lights, club music, and millions of other guys. So, tone everything down a few notches.

    5. Most of the time, you’re not going to have a wingman or alcohol in Day Game to help “push” you to approach. If you have “Approach Anxiety,” reward yourself for every time you approach without hesitating. This is how you build habits and “muscle memory.”

    6. Smile – it’s even more important in the daytime. At a club, the guy who doesn’t smile and approaches her is nervous. On a street corner, the guy who doesn’t smile and approaches makes HER nervous.

    7. Having good phone and text game is CRUCIAL if you want to be good at Day Game. Since even the best Day Game approaches often result in a phone number + date (since people have real time constraints during the day), you need to be good at converting phone numbers into dates.

Another Daygame Guide

Monday, February 1st, 2010

There is some good stuff in there. I agree with not using ‘excuse me.”

I think his stats on direct approaches have to be wrong since direct approaches are so affected by the individual PUA’s outer game (body language, clothes, looks, etc).

Interraction time varies per interraction. I’ve had several 7 hour sets and many 2 minute sets….that hooked.

You dont need to wear a suit but dress well (stylish).

Arranging the date during the sarge is good – it’s an old PU101 anti-flake tactic.

-Cuisine—————


From:

http://forumserver.twoplustwo.com/62/bbv4life/how-meet-women-during-day-tl-dr-obv-678329/?referrerid=15352

How to meet women during the day (TL;DR obv)
People asked for this after the last big post on all this stuff, so I went back and updated the old article I wrote. Obv it’s a wall of text again, but nowhere near as bad as last one.

Meeting women during the day has always been my favorite variety of pick up. I guess I just admire the audacity of it; plenty of guys can have a couple drinks out at night and find the courage to go talk to a girl, and everyone runs some degree of social circle game, but a day time cold approach is truly a rarity and sight to see. Additionally, most nights I just don’t enjoy spending my time in a club since I wouldn’t have much reason for being there other than chasing girls, and personally that feels a bit exhausting. I appreciate having the opportunity to have a proper conversation with a girl and getting to know her as opposed to the blaring sound of your average club or crowded bar. I’ve been asking girls lately how often they get cold approached directly during the day, and most of my answers are around 1-2 times a year, and my guess is that would be from a guy who’s just taking a shot with no technique.

At this stage, I’ve done somewhere between 200 and 250 direct day time approaches. I’ve done them mostly in Australia, Vegas, and a few in random places like Africa and Dubai (not the locals!) The methods and style I’ve learned is much of the result of Soul aka Jeremy (who I spent time with in Sydney), Paul Janka, and talking over details with my friend Tim Stubbs. Soul deserves the majority of the credit as he is the predominant author on the subject, and an excellent teacher.

Approaching:

I’ve tried a bunch of different methods and openers. Over time and study I’ve boiled it down to what I believe are the most effective ones. Before we get into actual openers, let’s discuss some logistics involved in opening.

First off, eye contact, body language, and tonality are hugely important. Stand up straight, look her directly in the eye, and deliver your opener slowly, smoothly, and at a decent volume. Smile, but don’t beam from ear to ear and don’t keep the smile permanently on your face. Carry yourself with the naturalness that you would speak to someone your familiar with in conversation.

If a girl is sitting, go sit down next to her (unless it’s a table with just a seat across, in which case you’d sit across.) If she is walking towards you allow her to go past then turn around and come up along the side. I used to attempt to approach women just as they were about to pass me, but this leads to two major problems; the girl may think you are trying to sell her something, and stopping a girls forward momentum is actually quite difficult. Approaching from the side I have realized is vastly preferable. If a woman is walking the same direction as you simply speed up a little and come up along the side, and again tap her briefly on the shoulder or arm and start your opener. If a woman is aware of your presence don’t heavily chase her down the street/mall, it’ll come off creepy. This is why you need to approach quickly, if she sees you and you linger around then take a shot it simply doesn’t come off very confident.

Types of openers for day game: I’ve found two kinds of openers are optimal for day game; direct and situational. Direct is clearly the best because it immediately sets you apart from nearly every other guy she’s ever met because nobody has the balls to do this. Situational is very good when a direct would be inappropriate, like say standing behind a woman in line at Starbucks. If you bomb her direct there it’s really uncomfortable if she’s not responsible and fairly awkward for everyone within ear shot. Natural openers can be okay for some spots during the day, particularly when it’s a semi-social circle setting like a college campus union, but if you try to cold approach moving girls with them they’ll simply think you’re being polite and keep walking.

Execution of direct opener: Approach the girl, maintain eye contact, touch her briefly on the shoulder or arm (when appropriate, don’t do this to a sitting girl across a table), and say “Excuse me, I know this is very forward of me, but I saw you from across the sidewalk (or whatever it is) and I thought you were really cute (gorgeous, looked stunning today, etc) so I wanted to come say hi.”

You can modify this to your personality and the occasion. I’m pretty chatty when I go up to girls so my opener is a bit more high energy and less full blown smooth than the way Jeremy does his. It’s something like “Excuse me, I know this is super random of me and pretty forward, but I saw you from across X and I think you are absolutely stunning, so I had to come say hi.”

I’ve read a number of thoughts on opening with excuse me, and after trial and error I think it’s better than not saying it. Because a direct day approach is a pretty crazy thing to do, being as polite and non crazy as possible seems highly pertinent. If you’re walking up to some girls or a group that’s conversing, make your first line “I apologize for interrupting but..” It’s the same with the “I know this is very forward of me” portion, you’re stating that you recognize you’re doing something out of the social norm and this lends you some credibility. As for the compliment portion, making it specific to the girl is better than something generic. If she’s wearing a stylish and eye catching red dress then something like “I thought you looked stunning in that stylish red dress of yours” is a nice way to get specific.

Here’s what will happen after a direct opener. Roughly 10% of the time the girl will be amazed and thrilled and just launch into an effortless conversation with you.Roughly 10% of the time the woman will seem a bit shocked and uncomfortable, and will look to exit the conversation immediately. About 80% of the time the woman will be somewhat pleasantly surprised but flabbergasted or say something only brief. For this 80% you need to transition. I often start by offering my hand and introducing myself as that anchors her to the conversation briefly and reduces some of the tension. I know some guys say not to offer your name, but in my experience this helps lock the girl in and prevent walk-aways, since it’s more rude to walk away from Tony, who was nice and polite, than random nameless guy.

Transitioning:

For a transition I might have something in mind. If I’m in a city with lots of tourism I’ll ask what brings them to that city. If I’m in a mall on a weekday I might ask “So you just knock off work to go shopping and leave the rest of them to sort it out?” If I’m on the sidewalk I might ask a simple “So what are you up to today in Melbourne?” I might just make a statement/comment/observation if something relevant occurs to me. Whatever you do, stay away from a transition that will lead to an obvious or brief answer. Asking a girl in a mall what she’s up to today will almost always result in an answer of “Shopping” and a look that says “Duh.” You can say simply “So what are you out shopping for today?” and go from there.

When you open situationally the conversation will flow a little more naturally. You’re often opening with a question or statement so just keep going and eventually change tangents to something more suggestive. Try to make situational openers playful when possible so the interaction has an air of flirtation. Say for example, I was in that Starbucks standing in line behind a girl. I might say “Excuse me, I’ve never drank a cup of coffee before in my life, can you make a recommendation?” Or if I’m in a clothing store I might take a piece of clothing, hold it up on myself and ask a woman “Do you think this will cover up my love handles?” (I’m a pretty thin guy so it’s clearly a joke.) Or in a book store where a woman is reading a magazine/book “Hey! We have a something in common!” *She inevitably asks what/huh/etc* “I too can read.”

Mastery Topics:

These are a recent discovery of mine, taught to me by Jeremy. I used to think in fairly linear attraction then qualification then comfort terms during day game. Jeremy proposes that you essentially combine the three and make them all more efficient by thinking about what you’re knowledge about that appeals to women, what you look for in women, and where and how you can build common ground on those shared interests. For example, my mastery topics I run with are things like travel, style and fashion, food, movies, reading, socializing, working out, poker, adventurousness and writing. When I enter a conversation I’m looking to move the conversation in the direction of some of those topics and look to find out if we have a shared interest in them. By getting on subjects I am knowledgeable and passionate about I’m able to display value.If and when the girl reciprocates by elaborating on her having similar interests this gives me an opportunity to compliment her on aspects of her personality as opposed to her looks, where we started. That said, mixing in compliments about her looks during the course of the interaction is normally a positive thing. After complimenting the girl I’ll likely point out how cool it is that we share that interest, and that I really appreciate someone with those qualities and know how rare it is. We’ll build some comfort by getting a little more in depth on the subject.

You want to go through this process a few times over the course of your interaction so the girl has concrete, legitmate reasons to see you again and not flake. If you’re getting flaked on a ton while doing day game (and we all get a lot of it from what I can tell) you need to amp up your qualification and comfort. It might feel impressive to build a lot of attraction while in the girls presence, but that dissipates quickly when you leave her. She needs solid reasons to actually go out on a date with you, other than you being slick and charming for a few minutes on the sidewalk. For those who have done some of this, if you think back on the times that the interaction went really well and the girl met up with you, you’ll likely realize that you wound up qualifying her naturally because she possessed the things you look for in a woman and you were happy to find it. Just make sure to let her know.

Once you get into conversation, I think maintaining an air of active disinterest is pretty important, in that you’ve come up and said something very direct and now you need to cool it and just be chilled out and normal. I like to relax my body language and lean up against something if there’s a good surface near by. I speak calmly, and a bit sarcastically. I want to be a little bit challenging, in that just because I came up to crack on to this girl doesn’t mean I’m throwing myself at her, I’m sussing her out a little too. I still maintain a ton of eye contact.

Jeremy aims to have these interactions last about five to ten minutes (Janka shoots for 45 seconds, which I think is totally crazy in any city outside of Manhattan and probably not optimal there but he would know better than me.) In my experience, the girls who wind up meeting up are the ones I spend more time with. This is probably because I’m nowhere near as efficient at qualification and building comfort as more experienced guys are, so right now most of my approaches that work out are like 10-20 minutes, sometimes longer.

Closing and follow up:

As you’re going through the interaction you should be pinging for the girls logistical situation. Why is she where she is? What part of town does she live in? What kind of places does she like to go out to? Does she come into this area often? You can do a brilliant pick up on a girl who is completely into you, but if the logistics are no good you’re ****ed.

I used to vaguely suggest a date idea before, then get her number, then try to arrange the date in the follow up. I’ve learned from Jeremy and Tim that the better way to go about things is to set a date during your interaction, and get a number as a result of that date. Jeremy usually closes by saying something like “You know I’m really enjoying talking with you. I think we should continue it some time over a drink, how do you feel about that?” I was originally surprised he phrased it as a question since my normal line was something like “Put your number in my phone and I’ll message you about that etc” What he aims to do is ask the girl how she feels about the drink (outside using appealing emotive language) is to watch the girls reaction and gauge how genuine she is in wanting to meet up. One reason he has such a low flake rate is that he won’t take a number from a girl who doesn’t seem keen to meet up, and if she hesitates he’ll say something like “You know you’re under no pressure and I won’t be offended, but I’d really enjoy getting to know you better.”

Once the girl agrees you should set up what you’re doing, when you’re doing it, and where you will meet. It helps to have knowledge of the city you’re in so you have good suggestions and recommendations in mind, so do some homework on the good places where you are (or where you’re visiting.) Aim for a date that night, and if she’s not available try to get it set up for the near future. Lock down the details then exchange numbers, and if you can punch something fun and memorable into her phone under your name. It doesn’t need to be stellar, just something playful. I often put “Guy in suit.”

Also, when talking with the girl keep an open mind about interesting date opportunities based on common ground. Some girls won’t commit to a date as sexually threatening as drinks at night based off fives minutes of chatting on the street, so finding things that are appealing for you both to do will help reduce flaking. Besides, you should want to be doing fun stuff with the women in your life. If I can sense they’re cool with it, I like to get girls to smoke pot with me in the evening.

Another thing to keep in mind is trying to bring girls into your reality (by which I mean, daily life.) Do things with her that you would naturally do anyway and find ways to incorporate her and make it fun if it wouldn’t be otherwise. These days I actually invite girls to come hang out with me while I work (which, when not dolled up, is me sitting at home playing poker on my computer.) However, I’ll work towards turning it into more a of a date; we’ll order food, I’ll have movies that we can watch while hanging on the couch and I switch to my laptop, I’ll engage her in chat nearly the whole time I play, etc. By the time I’m finished working I’ve laid all the ground work and I’ve already got her comfortable in my apartment. Logistics solved!

For follow up game, I normally start off by sending them a text later in the day with something fun, light, and with a callback humor reference if possible. I can’t tell you how to write call-back humor for an interaction I wasn’t present in, so you’ll have to be creative. Just don’t make the follow up text overly long, it sounds needy. On the whole, try to keep your texts shorter than the girls. I’ve also begun to call girls a lot more. This is for everyone’s benefit; some girls won’t meet up because they fear social awkwardness and chatting on the phone for a bit will sooth a lot of this. Additionally, I use a phone conversation to figure out whether this is a girl I’m actually interested in meeting. Sometimes I’ll have a 10 minute conversation with a girl and realize that getting drinks with her would be a total bore, even if she is really hot.

Know that most guys flake rates are quite high. Janka keeps meticulous track of records and says that he sleeps with 11% of numbers he gets, which is not surprising considering his mass efficency method. Jeremy says he gets a date out of around 70% of his numbers, which is excellent but also keep in mind that he focuses on not taking bad numbers and is extremely experienced. Personally I get a date with about 25% of my numbers right now, which seems a bit low but comparable to other guys on my experience level. There’s certainly room for improvement there and it’s something I’m working on.

Appearance:

As for your appearance for day sessions, I like to lean on the formal side (as I always do) but calibrate it to my environment. I like to wear a suit with no tie most sessions, the suit lends me an air of legitimacy but wearing a tie would be a dash too formal though I still like to mix it up now and then. Fashion is one of the things I like talking to girls about (and something they almost always like talking about) so I prefer mine to be noticeable. Still, you need to match your clothes to your location. In some places a suit is simply too out of place, so toning it down will look more normal.

For the most part though your style should just be congruent with who you are. As I’ve written before, women often aren’t particularly fussed exactly which style yours is, they just like to see that you have one and have put some thought into your appearance. Don’t wear things that feel really unnatural to you just because you think they will make you more appealing to girls.

Afterbite – Direct Daygame. Updated.

Friday, December 11th, 2009

Hey Cuisine,

I also wanna give you guys my longest version I have in English. Just for the love of the game I made it public….
Please comment on it, I would love to get your expert opinion on my daygame material. And yes, you can put this online on your website as well I would love that as well…

Peace!

Afterbite

——-

Bold and Italics are my comments.

-Cuisine

———–

Afterbite’s Direct Daygame Guide

Direct daygame is all about not wasting too much time when chasing girls during daytime. You will get a LOT more rejections than if you would the usual indirect daygame stuff you would learn from the oldskool methods of Mystery and Style or somewhere else on the internet. When I sometimes hear what girls hear from guys trying to pick them up during daytime I get sick with, cuz most guys are really pathetic when it comes to picking up women, especially during daytime.


Direct daygame is all about you having the self-confidence and balls that you approached directly without being a creepy needy AFC. There is a difference with being direct and being honestly direct. If you are direct in showing your desires (wanting to wank her) you are acting like an AFC. If you are being the self-confident guy who knows how to please girls and respect women you state your intentions (wanting to get to know her better as a human being /person).


I don’t think he makes this distinction clearly.

My daygame guide:

From my own experience I believe that Direct Daygame consists of: 40% inner game + 20% body language + 30% social intelligence + 10% verbal

INNER GAME:

- Self confidence is most important thing during daygame: you have to not only look confident, but be confident as well!

- Self-affirmations: I am the SHIT!” So it’s not: “I am shit” but it’s “I am THE shit!” Every time you think approaching a girl, let this go through your head. What I do is constantly repeat in my head ”I AM THE SHIT! – I AM THE SHIT! – I AM THE SHIT!” Also write this down hang it up somewhere in your room so you will be reminded with this on a daily basis.

- Smile romantically (no dirty thoughts): Create a feeling inside of total love and butterflies in your stomach. Be in love; not with the girl you approach but with everybody in general. Love everyone. It is important to be in-state and having the right mindset. Girls can sense when you are looking at them while having dirty thoughts. This makes sure you can never look at them the wrong way.

- Link your personality, kind of words you use/ language, outfit, and verbal conversational topics to one complete personality: your fashion& grooming must match your words. You have to be totally congruent with the personality you like to portray yourself.

- Be romantic: Think of all Hollywood films! Never clubgame but always daygame romances. So social conditioning says that this a beautiful love story which they can their family and friends about. So what do I do with this info? I take advantage of social conditioning! Just think a bit of Don Juan and Casanova.

- Become a High Status Alpha Male: Just imagine being Don Juan and think of how you would look the world…Imagine being him! Close your eyes and see yourself as the High-status Sensitive Romantic Alpha Male you always have dreamed to be end be him always, not only when you chase girls: BE HIM! You can also use other role models as JFK, Flavio Briatore, Gianni Agnelli, or whoever you see as the ultimate alpha male.

APPROACH:

- Directly zoom in with your eyes before you approached and do not break eye contact

- 100% eye contact

- Direct approach and opening

- Power of honesty: be honest and sincere sounding as if you never do this and this is just a strange magical event happening to the two of you.

- Pause and be Spontaneous: remember to pause from time to time so it looks like non-canned material and really spontaneously. Most of my material was originally made up spontaneous and on the spot but after having used the same lines over and over I try to still be spontaneous and make them feel I made these words for them only.

TALK:

- Speak in terms of metaphors as you describe something about your own life and guess in terms of metaphors how her life looks like: be a bit general so you are always right. I advice you guys to read horoscopes (I personally think it’s crap since I don’t believe in it but girls love it); this really works like a charm! It’s an original short cold read that she hasn’t heard before. How many times have girls heard ‘The Cube’ compared to what you have told her?

- DO NOT NEG!!!: Please do not NEG too much, especially with girls who have probably not experienced too much of this. I have lost lots of HB8-9s just because I became too cocky (& not funny for them) and by negging (in text, MSN or conversation). You can use it in NIGHTGAME, but for the love of God please don’t do it during daygame, especially when you want to portray yourself as the romantic Don Juan. So in short if you go negging while wanting to be Don Juan you will screw up cuz you’re incongruent!

He still doesn’t understand negging – negging works in day and night game, and should be playful.  One type of negging is the “tease neg,” which he is talking about below.  He lists it with “push pull, but doesn’t describe “push pull.”  They are different things.

- Tease and Push-Pull: Do not neg, but tease her a bit when it’s situational relevant and really funny (not only for you but also for her). Do not forget to tone it down to day to day interactions and not on the nightgame level of teasing.

- It’s all about how you say it: Words are not important or what you say…It is most important HOW you say it!

- Always be POSITIVE: Don’t gossip and talk negatively about other people/ experiences! If the girl tends to do this in conversation. Try to reframe it in a positive way. Many leaders are awesome in doing this. I personally constantly have to think of the former CEO of Carnegie Steel Company and later founded his own steel company in the 1900s Charles M Schwab (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Charles_M._Schwab). By being positive though not knowing a lot about producing steel, he was always positive and good in motivating people. Just try to see the good in everything and REFRAME everything positively. For example it can always be worse!  Btw, he’s not the Charles R Schwab (financial services)

- Be a Girl: Don’t take this too seriously.  Be original with what you say and think of “If I were to be a girl, how would I respond to this?” It’s always a good idea to test your talk with yourself: would this attract you if you heard this as a girl.

People will not understand the above section because they are not girls and generally can’t interpret things as a girl would.

- Don’t talk about sex or sex related topics! How would you respond if somebody came walking up to you and talk dirty? I have given a lot of advice regarding daygame to newbies but some guys are sometimes really hilarious: they ask girls “Would you like to <bleep> me?”,  “I think you wanna <bleep > me for 50 Euros”, “If I would make a dildo of my dick, would you like to go for a ride on it”. Do you know what is really stupid; they don’t listen to my advice and constantly come back with their same lousy questions why their daygame sucks deep and why  they get hit in the face….C’mon, do you want results or rejections???

Again, you can be sexual and use sexual tension without offering 50 euros for sex.  You can even accuse women of being really fast (sexual) escalators or treating you like a piece of meat (“I’m not just a p=slab of hot young beefcake” or  “hey my eyes are up here” a la PU101).  I tell short sexual stories.  Depends on the woman and situation.

- Being direct is not about stating your desires (wanting to wank her): Direct daygame is all about being the self-confident guy who knows how to please girls and respect women you state your intentions (wanting to get to know her better as a human being /person).

Afterbite, have you read Mode 1 by Currie?

- Fuck all routines you’ve learned from Mystery Method, Style or whoever that might work during nightgame but are socially awkward to ask during daygame. Okay, from time to time you can use some routines, but only when they are SITUATIONAL RELEVANT!

Depends on the routine, but some routines may be a problem.  I’ve used Ring Routine in daygame.

- Use your social intelligence and intellectual knowledge every time after she has told something about herself and don’t forget it’s best to use metaphors and when giving her an answer.  Reward her because you ACTUALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY wanted to know that about her in order to get to know her better because …. BE different than all the AFC’s only by asking and thinking they made a connection by asking lots of boring questions.

Afterbite, give examples.

- Remember everything & don’t forget her name: Don’t be the AFC that can only ask and ask and forget everything she has told you because you didn’t care. Make sure to pay attention to everything she tells you! How I remember a lot of the stuff girls tell me. I always try to imagine in my mind how their lives look like in a romantic way: dream of her reality (but not in an AFC way). Dream and describe in metaphors when she asks about it. The stuff she tells about herself can be used as a HOOK to maybe use it further down the conversation when the conversation dies a bit.

If you can do it, great. Use your cell to take notes after the set. put notes in her name with her cell #.  If that’s not enough…tell them you suck at names – they will say they do as well; give them a memory device for yours and ask for one for theirs.

- Use your own experiences of life as possible talk topics: If you have no clue what to talk about don’t just blur out some irrelevant DHV story. If you want to tell her a DHV story, don’t use some canned DHV story you got from the internet but make an own DHV story about yourself of something you have really experienced yourself. It should not be to impress her, that’s overdoing it! You should make it a light DHV story you should describe it as the most beautiful things on the face of this planet. And also lead the conversation that makes the story SITUATIONAL RELEVANT!

When to go direct or indirect?

My direct daygame doesn’t mean I always go in direct, because sometimes I go in indirect and slowly make the conversation more direct.

- STREET: Direct

- MUSEUM: Indirect/ Direct

- SHOPPING: Indirect/Direct

- TRAIN STATION: Direct

Not sure what you mean by train station. Metro game here in DC is tough enough without going direct. If it’s a train platform, escalators,  or the train itself (as below), go indirect.

- IN A TRAIN/BUS: Indirect

- UNIVERSITY CAMPUS: Indirect (unless it’s at another university where I don’t study)

So you don’t get a reputation?

- PARK: Direct

- CLUB (nightgame): Direct

BUT it also depends on the type of girl you are approaching! Because people are unique, you cannot approach every girl with the same approach. For this I have made a rule of thumb to remember me on the basis of the type of girl when to go direct or indirect:

The higher educated and/or older she is, the more DIRECT you can be.  And the lower educated and/or the younger she is, the more INDIRECT (& FUNNY) you should be.

Direct approach:

1. Direct approach with lots of eye-contact, zoom in, make her stop and start opener

2. Comfort building: start situational relevant conversation

3. Qualification: make her qualify herself a bit to you

4. False Time Constraint: tell her you have to go back to your friends who are waiting somewhere and that we should continue conversation sometime and ask her how we can best keep in touch.

5. Possible shittest: Make clear using a metaphor that you add value to her life. Do NOT state this directly that it’s love at first sight or that she SHOULD meet you again.

Give examples.

6. Close: #-close and a few kisses on the cheeks. If connection was really good, go for the kiss-close

But now you’re thinking; how can I implement this to my own life and my daygame? First thing I recommend you is to read it again. Then sit down and think: “How can I do this?” Just go in-field and practice while having this in the back of your head!

Afterbite’s Direct Daygame Guide (short version)

Wednesday, December 2nd, 2009

This was on Venusian Arts’ Forum and have been in touch w/Afterbite, a Dutch PUA. I’ll comment in italics and bold throughout.

-Cuisine

Afterbite’s Direct Daygame Guide (short version)

Currently I am working on my own Direct Daygame Guide [full-version] and currently it is around 14 pages long, and soon I will probably add another 5-10 pages (as I have made loads of paper notes which I am going to work out). Since this is a public forum the below Direct Daygame Guide is just a very short version so it doesn’t reveal all my game.

What are my daygame experiences?
I have been doing daygame before I even knew that there was any theory existing about pickup ( which was just half a year ago for me). Theory about it have excessively improved my skills and results, cuz now I could learn from the experiences and knowledge of the pro’s who had books, audio programs, etc. But most of what I learned from daygame is still the result of a lot of trial-and-error (the hard way). Accept from this I am currently shifting my focus a bit more to nightgame as it is easier to get more physical during nightgame. And I also need to study from time to time as I am still a student.

*Easier, yes, but you still HAVE to kino during daygame.

My daygame guide:
From my own experience I believe that Direct Daygame consists of: 40% inner game + 20% body language + 30% social intelligence + 10% verbal

*That seems wrong.  Outer game in general is important in Direct Daygame, not just body language.  Looks and clothing make more of a difference in direct daygame than regular daygame.

Direct daygame is all about not wasting too much time when chasing girls during daytime. You will get a LOT more rejections than if you would the usual indirect daygame stuff you would learn from the oldskool methods of Mystery and Style or somewhere else on the internet. When I sometimes hear what girls hear from guys trying to pick them up during daytime I get sick with, cuz most guys are really pathetic when it comes to picking up women, especially during daytime.

*Direct Daygame will also blow out girls who you could have gotten if you had NOT went in direct, but you do better with the girls you would have gotten anyway. So, when it hooks, it often REALLY hooks.  Basically…women have small “yes, he is hot” large “maybe” and large “no” categories. Men have large “yes” and “no” but small “maybe.”  So, when you direct approach a  girl..you are forcing her to decide base don your outer game and initial approach whether you are a “yes.”  So, the girls who have you “maybe’d” blow out.  It’s powerful stuff because when it hooks, it can be intense, but as a guy who gets girls by game and not looks (I’m short, heavy, older, balding)…I tend to go direct less often. When I really DO HAVE to approach a girl..I’ll go direct and it always hooks, but I do it once or twice a year. It helps if you REALLY MEAN IT.

*Also…I generally open on an attraction trigger (humor) and open situational indirect (playful indirect base don the situation) and that works really well for me.

Direct daygame is all about you having the self-confidence and balls that you approached directly without being a creepy needy AFC. There is a difference with being direct and being honestly direct. If you are direct in showing your desires (wanting to wank her) you are acting like an AFC. If you are being the self-confident guy who knows how to please girls and respect women you state your intentions (wanting to get to know her better as a human being /person).

*Afterbite, are you opening large sets and mixed sets?  That shows balls too, even indirect.

3 Key success factors of daygame:
- INNER GAME (Have balls): show your self-confidence to girls; they love it
- APPROACH (Just do it): don’t start pondering about approaching the girls, just do it!
- TALK (Be Natural): don’t let your game depend on canned material.

*Agreed – just approach! Canned material is fine with me if its YOUR OWN canned material (such as stories and personal routines and banter lines) or if you are a newbie.

INNER GAME:

- Self confidence is most important thing during daygame
- Self-affirmations: “I am the SHIT!” Dus niet: “I am shit” maar “I am THE shit!”
- Link your personality, kind of words you use/ language, outfit, and verbal conversational topics to one complete personality
- Think of all Hollywood films! Never clubgame but always daygame romances. So social conditioning says that this a beautiful love story which they can their family and friends about. So what do I do with this info? I take advantage of social conditioning!

APPROACH:

- Directly zoom in with your eyes before you approached and do not break eye contact
- 100% eye contact
- Direct approach and opening
- Power of honesty: be honest and sincere sounding as if you never do this and this is just a strange magical event happening to the two of you.

Yes, direct should be very sincere.

TALK:

- Never talk about sex or sex related topics
- DO NOT NEG!!!: Please do not NEG too much, especially with girls who have probably not experienced too much of this. I have lost lots of HB8-9s just because I became too cocky (& not funny for them) and by negging (in text, MSN or conversation).
- Words are not important or what you say…It is most important HOW you say it!

- Use your social intelligence and intellectual knowledge every time after she has told something about herself


*If negging is not working, you are doing in wrong.  A neg is a disqualifier, not an insult.  I use tease negs and banter and it works fine. The girl has to KNOW you are kidding when you call her a trouble maker or accuse her of trying to get you lost.   YOUR words are important (women get subtlety) as is how you say them…as is how you handle what they say.   You need to explain this better although I get it “- Use your social intelligence and intellectual knowledge every time after she has told something about herself.”

You can get them to visualize sex, making out with you, being with you in the future, etc.  It’s all in how you do it.   Subcommunication is your friend.  Also, longer sets give you time to build sexual tension and get more sexuality across.

How a typical Direct Daygame Approach looks like
1. Direct approach with lots of eye-contact, zoom in, make her stop and start opener
2. Comfort building
3. Qualification
4. Close


*Replace the Word “how” with the word “what.”

Though I have more a lot more of my own daygame guide, routines, pickup lines, etc, It’s best you guys to push yourself really hard to develop your own stuff… If I can achieve this level in just a few months, you can do this as well.

*Afterbite, how long are your sets generally?  Do you bounce girls?  Do you set up dates with them on the original sarge?  What types of venues are you doing?

*If that’s all you’re giving us, that’s all I can help you with. Thanks Afterbite. -Cuisine

Free Daygame CD from Vince Kelvin

Tuesday, October 20th, 2009

I was in the car w/Pras after daygaming last weekend at the mall and he played Vince Kelvin’s free daygame CD.  What I heard (cold reading/banter) was good (although I would alter a lot of it before I used it). BUT it was more general game than daygame specific.  I looked up how to get the free CD:

————————–

“We’ll, first to thank those who took the time to read this inteview, we’ll send our full value FREE Day Game Drills CD when you email us at: Vince@SeductionCoaching.com, and tell us where to send it!
We also have a FREE global PUA conference call every Monday at 7 PST, and by the way, we’d love to have you on it and do a special on Attractology and your group!
And then simply go to both of our sites…
FOR EVENTS AND PROGRAMS: www.SeductionCoaching.com
FOR LOADS OF FREE DOWNLOADS, with me and top MPUA guests such as Sinn, Speer, Mehov, David Wygant, Doc Holiday, Johnny Soporno, Decker from AMP, etc. go to www.VinceKelvinsPodcast.com
I also founded and co-host the Annual PUA World Summit with Johnny Wolf (TheSocialSecrets.com), for that go to www.PUASummit.com, and thank you guys for the opportunity to be of service, I hope you’ve found great value in this interview…”

Direct vs. Indirect Game

Saturday, September 12th, 2009

Everyone seems to be pushing direct as the method of choice in daygame, and I haven’t understood why.  I was going by Mystery‘s definition for direct: ” I saw you standing here and had to come meet you.”   Or “You are the cutest girl here and I wanted to see if there is more to you that meets the eye.”

I heard DJ Fuji (formerly head coach for Mehow) speak in DC last night and he said everyone who is good uses direct.  Knack and I were there and don’t do that much direct so we asked what he meant.  He did not mean the above definition of Direct Openers.  He meant “not being very indirect” as with an opinion opener.   So, to DJ Fuji, “Hey, how are you?” is direct.  Ok…by that definition, nearly everyone is direct in daygame. :)

There does seem to be a lot of confusion about this in the community.

Hoops/Shit Tests/Frame Control

Monday, September 7th, 2009

I was recently asked by a Daygamer.com sbscriber how to handle it when girls try to get you to jump through hoops or be a dancing monkey.  Easy answer is hold on to your frame and don’t comply; stay in control, and steal their frame if you can.

Here is an example from earlier in the summer.  I was working with a daygame client (F) and we were sitting in a cafe.  I opened a middle eastern girl (HB8) and bantered her a while until she went to get a drink, and she sat on the other side of the safe in a couch.  I was helping F with his material, so we didn’t reposition to talk to her again even though she came to us and told me where she was sitting.  

We left to do some daygame and in a couple of hours we went back to the cafe for cold drinks and she was there on the other side reading, so I reopened the set.  I reopened and it went fine.  At some point she pushed a pen and paper towards e and told me to write something (a restaurant recommendation?) down (even though it was easy enough for her to do it).  I told her to do it…and we went back and forth but neither of us wrote it down – I didn’t comply and (jump through her hoop) she wouldn’t write it down either.  She was testing me.  Shit tests are good because it means the girl wants to see if you are real. 

So, talked a bit more and momement of truth…i went for the #.  I figured she might shit test me or make me work for the #.  She only tried for a second. I started going for the # and she said to write mine down, and I said “no…I’ll call you so you have mine too, what is your #?”  She complied without a problem. 

One thing that was great was that the client was there and able to watch and hear the whole set. :)

Oh, and after working on attraction (his weakness) all day, the client got a makeout at an event I brought him to.

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More recent examples of controlling the set in daygame;  this was Eastern Market: 

A bee was pestering two girls we (a client and I) were talking to.  I told them to remain calm (controlled the frame), and then we put an empty lemoade cup 10 feet from us and the bee landed there and left us alone. A guy came in to kill it and I told him not to mess with her pet bee.  he had attempted to enter our set…and i stopped him.  The bee was no longer bothering anyone…why kill it? He wanted to play the hero to 2 girls who were already talking to 2 guys.

We were talking to 2 girls at a shop and the store owner tried to interfere by asking if I wanted to buy the necklace.  I told him i’d get back to him…without focusing on him and then drew the girl into banter about the necklace.  The message:  The girls are fine talking to us, and I’ll let you know when I need your help with merchandise.