Two of our readers commented regarding the CD definition I posted. Puma asked about CD in game, and Adonis responded (under his Charming Rogue account on twitter) saying that he would followup with more info.  here it is (thanks):

Adonis – Cognitive Dissonance

To truly understand the process of seduction, a working understanding of the theory of Cognitive Dissonance is necessary. Cognitive Dissonance is caused when a person holds two or more conflicting or contradictory beliefs about the self. When this is experienced, it causes a person so much discomfort that they will typically rationalize one belief away. For example, a woman you have approached and attracted suddenly finds herself wanting to go to bed with you, but this conflicts with her idea of being a good girl or at least not a slut.

(Note: The term “slut” is a construct created by women to use as a weapon to lower other women’s social value. I have no misogynistic intentions in using this word. As previously stated, I believe women should be free to engage in any sexual acts she so desires without judgment.)

She then rationalizes that going home with you was “meant to be” or “fate” and therefore it is permissible for her to act on her impulses. Her cognitive dissonance has been removed.

Cognitive Dissonance is also why proper escalation is so effective. If she is complying with each of your escalations she will often possess two conflicting beliefs:

1) Things are rapidly getting more and more physical and intimate; and
2) Only an “easy” or “slutty” girl would allow rapid escalations to happen with someone they don’t really like. In order to abet her cognitive dissonance, she will rationalize to herself that she must really like you because she is definitely not easy or a slut.

Cognitive Dissonance is an important component of Sexual Framing. I will be covering the tools I actually use to Frame a Women Sexually in an upcoming article.

“Hi C********,

Thanks for your warm note. And thanks for forwarding the video clip. What’s it like eating pork?

We do have things in common. To up the ante, we’d have even more in common if we agreed on the following:

~ Like me, you believe that marriage should be defined as between one man and one woman

~ You’re think children do best in homes headed by a husband and a wife

~ You understand that being socially conservative can also mean that you’re thoughtful, cultured, and open-minded … not racist, homophobic, etc., as the left accuses you of being.

~ You’re grateful that, despite Bush’s flaws, we did not see a single act of domestic terrorism for over 7 years on American soil

If this sounds like you … we would hit it off splendidly.
Have a good start to the day!

-L*******”

———-

P.S. She’s getting screened out (doesn’t meet the qualifications for me).

This weekend was a blast.  I worked the Venusian Arts bootcamp with Lovedrop, Discovery (London), and Adept (a local coach like Knack).   VA calls me (and adept and Knack) in when they are in NYC or DC.  The students mainly seemed to be from NY, PA, and the DC area…although one flew in from NM.  Knack is in Mexico (not NM) right now.

Girl Candy was there as were two former students of mine from last year – one of which (Derby, who Discovery called “Darby” at the beginning of the bootcamp and “Ditzy” near the end) is now a sales associate for VA (they are looking for more sales help, btw).   The other student is a great guy who is a former stutterer who helps other stutters speak better – a leader in that community.

I don’t want to give a play by play on the whole thing, but I will write a few posts about the weekend.

On meal breaks, anyone who wanted to could come with me to whatever restaurant i was heading to…so I got to spend time with the students outside the lectures and clubs, including ones who didn’t join us in-field.  Some of my stories are about the daygame that happened between the hotel and meals.

In a bar (Saturday night)…I asked a girl for her # and she she “No. you give me yours.  I’m a contract negotiator. You won’t win this, give up now!”  I got her # anyway and she and her room mates met us elsewhere later that evening.”   Many times, you can get a number even if a girl says no.  In this case, she was “shit testing” me – seeing if I’m real and can handle her.

To Be Contiunued Soon…

So, I switched matchmakers and talking to my new one of the phone.  She flaked on the 2 previous appointments.

What I found out?

All the matchmakers are in Israel so there is a major time difference.  Their network here in DC is tiny. With me haveing previously dated or befriended 4 girls, approved 3 (2 declined me), declined a few, approved and went on a date with one…and not being open to outside the DC area…there isn’t much else she can do.  She has one mor match to send me and then she will see if anyone new pops up.  And, I do standards she has to meet when matching. 

This matchmaker is definitely better than the old one so let’s see what happens.

Apparently, my matchmaker has made attempted 2 matches to women on my behalf, and other matchmakers made 3.  So, I’m waiting for their responses to see how bad the matches are. :)  At least they are trying to match me up.  One of the three from another matchmaker was horrible:

#5:  (Other matchmaker) I declined: Just plain bad match.  Age and physical match are off.

Shelly and I are both trying this Jewish online matchmaking service.  It’s cheaper than Jdate…and I know someone on it who likes it.

The matchmakers say that they are about quality matches over quantity…so they make few matches (a problem).  You come up on their client rotation once a week, but I keep in touch with mine, so she looks in on me a bit more.  in 2 weeks…she has made 4 match suggestions. Unacceptible.  Plus, we spoke on the phone and she really isn’t listening to me and what (such as not being really far away) or what or I am attracted to.   I probably need to switch to another matchmaker (I know which one of the otehr 4 looks better) although the new matchmaker would still suggest about the same # of matches from the same pool.  She might suggest better matches.

This site will not do well…suggesting a couple of matches a week.  Matchmeker mentality without being a good enough matchmaker to pull off quality over quantity matches.  Don’t waste your time.  I don’t recommend the service.  I have a couple of months left there, so I will update if things change.

The match suggestions so far:

#1:  I already had a date scheduled for that night w/her.   From Speeddating.  Not a bad suggestion on her part though.

#2: good (not great) looking girl. I accepted.  She declined.

#3:  I declined. Problem with her not meeting distance (wasn’t terrible like the matches Shelley is given in farther places like Boston and NYC).  Also, a larger problem with physical type requrements.  My requirements aren’t terrible and are listed within my (matchmaker only) area of profile.  One picture of this match is terrible. This is both the matchmaker slacking and not listening to me.

#4:  I Accepted, now it’s up to her.  Not my physical type  but not terrible.  She didn’t list her physical type correctly, so I can’t really blame the matchmaker.  I’ll give her a shot.  Let’s see if she accepts.  One picture of hers is bad.